Comments on: Avoiding Isolation In Addiction Recovery… It Aint Easy

By: chris

chris — Tue, 02 Mar 2010 12:33:44 +0000

Hi Raj, that’s my problem, I find it difficult to stick to a personal change. It always happens that after some time, my old bad habits return.

By: chris

chris — Tue, 02 Mar 2010 12:32:31 +0000

Hi. I’m a medical student from the Philippines. I read your blog because I was searching for a story about isolation and and how people recover from it. I have this tendency to get depressed and socially withdraw myself when under overwhelming challenges. Lately, I joined a fraternity and mixed with med school, it was quite overwhelming for me. The sad thing is, instead of facing these challenges, I started out by escaping my new responsibility as a frat member and felt depressed and slept throughout most of the day. This habit worsened as I alienated myself from my old friends and other fraternity members who were my friends before I joined the fraternity. I used to be very jolly and friendly, and used to joke a lot, that’s why people loved me, but now I am this quiet person who doesn’t interact anymore. When it’s time for lunch, I just go to my apartment and lie down until the next class. I look forward to nothing than to just lie down in bed, regardless if I sleep or not. I even skip classes just to lie down literally the whole day. I don’t know why I’m writing this. Maybe I just feel that you’d understand my situation.

I’ve been seeing a main psychiatrist and 2 others (not that often) who are family friends. They all did their psychotherapy and given me medication to combat my depression. Now, all they say is that it is up to me to break this isolation habit and reach out to my friends. Well, I find it hard. I just wish I never joined the fraternity at all because before that, as I said, I was OK. Now, I don’t interact with anybody, and I think I am addicted to lying down, and I am so hopeless, but somehow, I try to talk to people, but I avoid frat members and places where the frat people hang out. I just miss my old life.

By: Edward

Edward — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 18:20:05 +0000

isolating over years just got me my own apartment. my wife reached a critical point and I agreed and left.

But recovery has been ongoing and we are talking some.

It’s not over yet. Fellowship with a new group within church and others is making a difference.

Life means more and I am living versus hiding and turning inward. Thanks for your insight.

By: Coline Bettson

Coline Bettson — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 03:53:33 +0000

Hello & thank you – found your site through ” Stumble Upon.”

Like what I see so far – especially this post on isolation.

However, as a 57 year old recovering drunk, seems to me keeping to myself lessons the need to drink, for now. Funny stuff, as my darling husband is a minister & all we do is social…

all the very best !

By: Erin

Erin — Mon, 23 Jun 2008 14:23:36 +0000

Thanks so much for checking out the site Jen. I appreciate it. I’m really sorry that you’re in such a tough spot. No one should have to deal with this sort of thing.

As for leaving your husband. I honestly agree with you and think that by leaving him to fall further down you are actually helping him. By sticking around you are pretty much delaying the inevitable rock bottom.

Who knows, losing his wife and kid could be the very bottom he needs to hit. I understand that rationally it seems like the right thing to do but rational has little to do with love right? Tough decision. Keep your head up.

By: Jen

Jen — Mon, 23 Jun 2008 14:05:07 +0000

Hi, I really enjoy reading you blogs. My husband is an oxy addict (I’m sure that is not the only addiction). Last November I had him in detox, it got bad, he lost his business, destroyed us financially and we are losing our house. It was when he was in detox that I thought he finally admitted he had a problem and would be back to “normal” again. We have a 2 year old daughter. Well since November I haven’t seen much improvement, I figured I would stay with him (isn’t that what my marriage vows say, for better or worse in sickness and health) Even though it has felt like rock bottom for me I don’t believe he has hit rock bottom. He is still hiding things (weird places) all kinds of crazy things and yes I even tested him (without him knowing) and he has tested positive for oxi. when I confronted him yesterday by the notes I found….very drug dealerish, he said he knew people that were jonesing and he was just connecting them with people to make a few extra bucks…..sounds like drug dealing to me even though he doesn’t see it. He said he is doing good. I don’t see how he could possibly be doing good keeping himself in that very environment that got him as bad as he got (arrested etc…again crazy marfia movie stuff) So here I am, sweet, niave innocent me. I love my husband but I think I need to leave him. He needs to be without me and his daughter, he needs to hit rock bottom. He needs to lose it all so he hopefully can finally get help and stay in recovery.
In a nutshell I really enjoy reading your blogs, there are so many similiarities and it also makes me hopeful. Keep up the good work. Be proud of yourself!
Jen

By: Raj

Raj — Wed, 11 Jun 2008 10:51:29 +0000

Well, I see so much of me in what you have written the need to be self aware is never ending I guess, when we are not, we slide back in to old ways of doing things

By: pat

pat — Tue, 10 Jun 2008 23:42:03 +0000

Interesting post Erin.

By: The Discovering Alcoholic

The Discovering Alcoholic — Mon, 09 Jun 2008 23:29:23 +0000

Great post Erin. It took me years just to learn to smile. It is amazing at how a smile can open up conversation and opportunity… and how much practice it took me for it to become natural.

Alcoholic thinking cannot stand the light of day or outside scrutiny.