I have been going on for a couple of posts about my inability to talk about some stuff that has really been bothering me. Well, it is with a huge sigh of relief that I tell you that I was finally able to open up about these issues (the details of which I won’t bore you with). I should have done it sooner.
I still had to be dragged kicking and screaming into the conversation but once I was in it… I was so glad I was. Things are not magically fixed but I feel a hell of a lot better now that I’ve gotten a few things off my chest. Funny how that works huh?
So then this leads me back to the same question I have been having… “why do I find it so hard to talk about my feelings?”. I just don’t get it. Am I afraid of the reaction I will get? I don’t know. What I do know is that nothing but heartache comes from keeping your feelings in and that I absolutely need work in this area of myself. But who doesn’t need work right?
Today I have a sense of relief that I haven’t had in a long, long time. I need to remember this feeling the next time I think about stuffing my feelings. I’m grateful that I can spot these destructive habits in myself before they get way out of hand. I’m grateful for a lot of things these days.