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This is going to sound bizarre but I realized that watching TV has taught me how to delay instant gratification.

In a world where everything is available NOW, it’s no wonder that we grow to expect things right now. That includes our gratification.

What I realized this morning while I was thinking about my absolute most favorite show of all time, Lost, is that even the way I watch TV has changed since entering addiction recovery. So let me tell you how TV has taught me to delay instant gratification. Read the rest of this entry »

If you are familiar with addiction recovery, you know that living life one day at a time is a major part of a successful recovery.

I’m here to say that in order to be happy, healthy, and have a little peace of mind in life you need to not only live one day at a time…you need to begin being present. Learn to stay in the moment. Read the rest of this entry »

The post I recently did about learning to accept the things I cannot change got me thinking about a negative behavior that I was riddled with in active addiction…not facing problems head on.

The behavior of avoiding problematic situations is something that is very common with addicts. See, the key to successfully living in denial about all of your problems is to numb yourself into oblivion until you don’t think about them anymore. Simple right?

So what happens when you are no longer numbing away your problems with drugs or alcohol? Well, unless you want to continue living a miserable life that is completely based on denial and a disconnection from your soul you need to master the art of facing problems head on in recovery. Read the rest of this entry »

I was thinking about the part of the serenity prayer that says “grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change”.

Now, I’m not going to try and fool you into thinking that I go to NA/AA meetings all the time by talking the talk.

But, I do want to point out that there are a lot of things that I took away from my time in NA/AA that I find useful in my everyday life.

One of the things that I feel that I’ve struggled with has been the whole accepting the things I cannot change. Rationally I know the importance of this acceptance but I have struggled to take that rational thought and put it to use in my life.

That was until I heard myself telling my son “you do what you can, the very best that you can, and that is all you can do”. Boom! How simple. But could it truly be that simple to accept the things I cannot change?

Read the rest of this entry »

You know how you file each blog post under a category? Well I was going to post something and thought that I would make a category named “personal”.

Ooh, a personal category. That’s where I could put all the stories about my life. Wait a minute…isn’t this whole site about my life? It’s personal really. Wouldn’t I therefore have to put everything I wrote under personal?

I guess I’ll skip that category. But this did bring up a nice reminder that I would like to share with you. Everything that I’m writing about on this site really is my life. I’m no fortune teller…we’re just all in the same boat. Read the rest of this entry »

So, you know THOSE type of days. Everything that could go wrong does go wrong down to the tiny things like driving away from the drive through to realize that they gave you a flavored iced coffee instead of the coffee flavored iced coffee that you wanted and needed…desperately.

So on a day when all those little things combined with a few big things start to pile up, how do you get through? That is, how do you get through with out the old standby solution of smoking or drinking or snorting your troubles away…for a little while. Read the rest of this entry »

In active addiction, part of my avoidance tactics included taking something like a small nagging headache and turning it into a reason to miss work, lay in bed all day and pretty much take a vacation from life.

Since those minor aches and pains show up more and more in active addiction…I spent a lot of time “sick”.

The tendency to either fake or exaggerate illness as an avoidance tactic did not go away just because I stopped taking drugs.

It seemed that anytime I had an extremely full day or I wasn’t in that great of a mood, my brain would want me to pretend that I was sick as a way of getting out of life.

It took a lot of hard work but I can say that since entering into addiction recovery I have not given into these impulses and have not once been “sick” for the sake of laying low. I felt that I was able to modify my bad behaviors. But let me tell you what I am experiencing now… Read the rest of this entry »

Our world today is based upon instant gratification. Taking into consideration all of the technology that allows us to get what we want right when we want it, it’s really no wonder that we are trying to apply that standard to our emotional state.

Think of all the ways that people use drugs or alcohol pertaining to instant gratification. If you are having a stressful day…pop a pill and feel de-stressed. If you are feeling a little social anxiety or lack of confidence in a situation…have a few drinks and get some liquid courage.

By feeding these types of emotional needs with drugs or alcohol we are in a way giving ourselves a quick fix - instant gratification. We are not working on the actual problems but finding an easy way out of them. But since instant gratification in all other areas of life have now become the norm…how are we supposed to delay our need for instant gratification? Read the rest of this entry »

I was taking a look online for some addiction related videos and found a series of addiction related videos of Dr. Robert Lefever. In this series he tackles a lot of the main topics of addiction and addiction recovery in a way that can make sense to anyone. One of the videos that I found interesting is called Recovery 7: What Makes An Addict. Here he explains the difference between these people…are you normal, an idiot, or an addict? Read the rest of this entry »

Have you ever caught yourself judging people that you are seeing for the first time, say in a crowd. While you are people watching you are actually projecting yourself, good or bad, onto others. When you have doubts about yourself or things that you don’t like about yourself…you see the same in others. This is because the doubts in yourself are actually based upon guilt and projection is a way for your ego to cast your guilt onto others. Read the rest of this entry »