One of THOSE Days…Getting Through Tough Days In Recovery « What Winners Do

One of THOSE Days…Getting Through Tough Days In Recovery

Posted on June 2, 2010

So, you know THOSE type of days. Everything that could go wrong does go wrong down to the tiny things like driving away from the drive through to realize that they gave you a flavored iced coffee instead of the coffee flavored iced coffee that you wanted and needed...desperately.

So on a day when all those little things combined with a few big things start to pile up, how do you get through? That is, how do you get through with out the old standby solution of smoking or drinking or snorting your troubles away...for a little while.A while ago I had written about the lingering consequences of addiction that can show up in our recovery. My particular lingering consequence has to do with me going to court because of some money that I owe. Not an outrageous amount but an amount big enough that I can't just pay it all right away.

Today was a follow up court date. Fine, not the end of the world. I'll go and sit in a court house all day and have the security lady be rude to me even though I was nice as pie, and I'll have some weirdo guy that stinks like booze sit next to me and want to strike up a conversation about ? I have no idea and I'll...well you name the little annoying thing and I went through it today.

I get it...I owe money, the creditors had to take me to court to get my money and I shouldn't expect my time in a court house to be like a day at the spa.

I also understand that my trip to the court had put me in a less than jovial mood causing every other little daily annoyance to be magnified leaving me shaking my head about 30 times today wondering...WTF?

Then I realized something. Even though I was shaking my head asking WTF, I was a little amused about just how bad everything was going. I realized that today was one of those days where you just hang on and wait for it to be over.

I didn't try to change the feelings this day was causing inside of me by going and getting effed up. I also didn't try to use this day as a justification to shirk my responsibilities and run back to bed with a "headache". Nope, I just realized what was going on and I hung on for dear life.

I don't have enough money to fix one of my cars, my car payment is late by a couple of days because of something that came up needing a large amount of money asap, I had to go to court today, I ate an egg sandwich for dinner tonight because that's all I had in the house and I won't have money to buy food until tomorrow.

But you know what? I made it through today without using any mood altering substances to change the way I was feeling. I feel my mood improving and I feel good knowing that today is over. Tomorrow is a new day and nothing that happened today has any real effect on how I feel tomorrow. Life is good.

Tagged as: addiction recovery, coping skills Leave a comment

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bottlecappie
March 11th, 2008 - 23:43

I guess it’s all about perspective, huh? Good for you for keeping yours while dealing with all of that.

It’s funny – I find that I’m pretty good and level-headed in a crisis, but those little things, like getting the wrong coffee, can wreck my mood if I let it.

It’s so great that you can be with uncomfortable feelings, and not deny them or stuff them – which I think is tempting to do when you can’t medicate them away. That seems really healthy.

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Jen
March 12th, 2008 - 17:12

It occurs to me reading your post that recovering addicts are so very brave.
And probably don’t think they are.
But I think so.

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Jen
March 12th, 2008 - 20:31

I had one of those days today, as a matter of fact! After about 4 hours of trying to maintain civility and feeling like I was failing miserably, I finally gave up and hung a “Cranky!” sign on my cubicle. I expected to be left alone, given a wide berth. Instead, it seemed like everyone wanted to argue that I was, in fact, NOT CRANKY ENOUGH TO WARRANT A SIGN. (not even close, I was told)

Hmmm. Maybe it was just me then. But it’s a good sign that no matter how crabby I was internally, outwardly I was very much in control.

That is PROGRESS right there.

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Erin
March 12th, 2008 - 20:41

I guess the main point of this post and the post before it about How To Make Yourself Feel Better was just to emphasize the fact that no one feels happy all the time. It’s just not going to happen.

But just because we are not gleaming with a smile from ear to ear we don’t have to feel like it’s the end of the world or that we’re doing something wrong in life.

Our happiness ebbs and flows and that is the way it goes. I think the sooner we can truly accept that and learn to deal with it, the more peace of mind we will have in life. And really, that is all you can ask for.

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maureen begley
February 20th, 2010 - 03:06

I just started reading your blog & I find myself really enjoying reading what you have written.
Thinking of starting a blog myself, however I am not quite sure.
Sub really seemed to help you, I am thinking about switching from methadone to sub\
Keep up the good work & keep on writing

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