Early in recovery I learned that is very important to handle things as they come up. What does this mean? It means not putting off any problem just because I feel like I can’t deal with it at the moment. It means facing problems head on. It means not saying, I’ll do it tomorrow… cause we all know that aint happening 
.
Somehow I let this practice slip to the wayside for a while. The result? I felt overwhelmed with problems and situations that I had left unaddressed. What does this overwhelmed feeling lead to? It leads to a sense of dread over the future. Things left unaddressed don’t just go away. Small problems get bigger and bigger until they explode. Then you’re left to pick up the pieces. Not a great way to live.
The remedy? Deal with things as they come up. End of story. That’s all it takes. Even if you’re not perfect at doing that… it’s a nice thing to strive for. I’m not sure why I have such a hard time with this pretty basic idea. What is it inside of me that wants to just avoid problems and conflicts? It’s not that avoiding things makes me feel good. It does just the opposite. It makes me feel bad about myself. So why then do I tend to do this?
Maybe this is just one of the things I will never know the answer to. Maybe it’s enough that I realize that I have a tendency to do this, it allows me to work on not doing it.
Sometimes I forget that I’m always going to be a work in progress. It’s easy to lose perspective on that. I guess the fact that I’m realizing different areas of myself need work is a great thing. It just shows that I am a self aware person and that I’m able to keep myself in check before things get totally out of hand. I guess that’s what it’s all about right?
Related posts:
don (2)
Cera (1)
gita (1)
Kim (1)
laurie way (1)
Mary (1)
penny (1)
Richard Haden (1)
Talley (1)
{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }
It took me a while to realize this, but I think it’s imporant that I don’t just lump my fear of conflict and inability to confront problems head on, into my list of “Things that are wrong with Tim”
It sounds to be like one of your strengths is the ability to make others happy. You can be proud of that. There are people out there who’s personality is such that that thrive on conflict or others who are so aggressive that they rub others the wrong way.
What I’m trying to say is that while it’s good to address problems head on, I hope you can also realize that being gentle with people, might just be part of who you are.
Thanks Tim.