Happy Mothers Day

October 23, 2009 — 1 Comment

My mother was so supportive of me when I finally told my family I had a substance abuse problem. Since it is Mothers Day I thought it was fitting to talk about what role a supportive mother can have in addiction recovery.

When I finally said the words out loud to my mother that I had been abusing oxycontin for about a year and was addicted, she could have easily been disgusted with me. I know I was disgusted with myself. But she wasn’t. She told me everything was going to be ok. That this will pass, I’ll get through this.

When I was in a lock down psyche ward of a hospital feeling like I was going to die from my withdrawals, my mother came to see me every day, she told me she was proud of me, she loved me, and that the fact that I was seeking the help I needed shows I can do anything I put my mind to. My mother kept assuring me that everything was going to be good again.

When I got out of rehab and went back to her house to live with my husband and child my mother was the one that kept telling me what a great job I was doing. She regularly told me that she was so proud of me for fighting against this and that I was becoming a better person.

My mother’s words of encouragement helped me more than I can ever put into words. I still feel bad about putting her through all of the worry and heartbreak that I did. But I’ve come to the conclusion that there is absolutely nothing I can do about the past. What I can do is make sure that she never has to deal with anything like that again by staying clean.

Because I am a mother now myself, Mothers Day has taken on a different meaning for me. I can say that this year, I truly deserve to be celebrated on Mothers Day. Last year, not so much.

This year I am not actively addicted, I am in addiction recovery and have once again put my child’s needs above my own. It should have always been that way but sadly it seems my addiction shoved my child back to second place for a while.

Now my actions as a mother truly reflect the great job that my mother did raising me in a loving home (my dad did a good job too in our home but today is mothers day!). I hope my mother knows that all of the good things she had to say about me when I was going through this horrible time in my life was actually a reflection upon herself. She raised a good person and showed her how to respect and love others. My mother showed me that you always put your kids needs above your own and that love from a mother truly is unconditional.

Happy Mothers Day

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