As much as all of us have things about ourselves that we are working to change, there is one thing that should always be constant…You need to love and accept yourself. But does loving and accepting yourself mean that you should just deal with your behaviors as is?
I was looking over my past posts and noticed that I spend a lot of time talking about all of the behaviors about myself that I hope to change. There are plenty of them so it really does provide a lot of areas that I can blog about. I want to make sure that I’m painting a clear picture of myself though so I’m going to let you in on something. Come a little closer…I like myself and I am happy with myself.
Don’t you find that mind blowing? Well I certainly do. There was a time when I was in very early recovery that I wasn’t too pleased with myself. I would have this list in my head of all the things I needed to change about myself before I could be happy. What I didn’t realize is that instead of helping myself I was pushing myself further down. I was saying that I wasn’t good enough as is to deserve happiness.
When my brain was still in addictive thinking mode, I was not going to be able to do any of the self improvements that I needed. The reason being that I wasn’t considering them as an improvement to an already good thing, I was thinking of it as changing myself in order to be a good person.
After a while of spinning my wheels I kind of gave up. I said ok, this isn’t working. I guess I’ll just have to accept the fact that this is the way I am. Once I did that…everything changed. Instead of beating myself up for not being this perfect person that I thought I should be, my sense of humor kicked back in and I found the ability to laugh at myself and my imperfections.
Once I wasn’t so hard on myself I was able to start making some improvements. I didn’t want to be a different person, I wanted to live up to my potential. That is exactly what I’m working on now.
So from time to time I will write about certain things that I’m doing in an effort to improve myself. I just wanted to make it clear that I’m not doing these things because I don’t like myself right now. I absolutely love myself. I’m proud of myself for my accomplishments so far. Because I recognize my accomplishments I now have confidence that I can keep moving forward and succeed at most anything I put my mind too.
Liking yourself the way you are should be your main goal. Once you accomplish that you will see that making improvements to yourself will then come naturally.