Comments on: Relapse Prevention: You Can Change Your Friends But What About Family? http://www.whatwinnersdo.com/triggered-by-family-members/ Stories, Struggles And Success of A Recovering Addict Trying to Do What Winners Do Thu, 11 Mar 2010 01:53:04 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.1 hourly 1 By: A Recovering Addict Helplessly Watching An Active Addict http://www.whatwinnersdo.com/triggered-by-family-members/comment-page-1/#comment-294 A Recovering Addict Helplessly Watching An Active Addict Sun, 12 Aug 2007 19:00:29 +0000 http://www.whatwinnersdo.com/triggered-by-family-members/#comment-294 [...] out a way to hang out with my brother without putting myself in a dangerous position. After all you can change your friends but not your family. What has actually happened is that my brother, the same one that could at times be seen as a [...] [...] out a way to hang out with my brother without putting myself in a dangerous position. After all you can change your friends but not your family. What has actually happened is that my brother, the same one that could at times be seen as a [...]

]]> By: Bill Urell http://www.whatwinnersdo.com/triggered-by-family-members/comment-page-1/#comment-123 Bill Urell Mon, 18 Jun 2007 01:21:20 +0000 http://www.whatwinnersdo.com/triggered-by-family-members/#comment-123 I hear you. Early in my recovery I only heard black and white solutions, never hang out with old friends, never go here or there. What I learned about relapse prevention is that there are 2 sets of situations, those you can avoid (peolple,places and things), and those you cannot avoid..m like family and work. So what I did is avoided the obvious danger situations and with ones I could not avoid I learned to set limits and boundaries. I remember one long time friend I did not want to cut off, so I told him 'I love you like a brother but can't be with you when you're using. I'm trying to change' I felt bad doing it, but he understood and respected the deal (after testing the limit once or twice). But it worked out. Bill I hear you. Early in my recovery I only heard black and white solutions, never hang out with old friends, never go here or there. What I learned about relapse prevention is that there are 2 sets of situations, those you can avoid (peolple,places and things), and those you cannot avoid..m like family and work.

So what I did is avoided the obvious danger situations and with ones I could not avoid I learned to set limits and boundaries. I remember one long time friend I did not want to cut off, so I told him ‘I love you like a brother but can’t be with you when you’re using. I’m trying to change’ I felt bad doing it, but he understood and respected the deal (after testing the limit once or twice). But it worked out.

Bill

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