So are you gaining weight in addiction recovery? Ya, me too. It may come as no surprise to hear that while actively addicted to drugs I had no problem maintaining a weight that I felt comfortable with. Now that I’m not on drugs anymore…not so much.
While on drugs my idea of a filling meal was a balance bar. It was because of this that pounds started melting away and I was at a more “healthy weight”. Yes, go ahead and laugh. While on drugs I thought of myself as being healthy.
Now that I’m trying to meet my basic needs, H.A.L.T.:Hungry Angry Lonely Tired, I have been gaining weight. I guess I’m doing more than meeting my hunger needs, I have been over eating. I had the mentality of, “well, I can’t do anything else, I might as well eat”. This is not a good idea. Believe me.
Little by little I have been noticing that my shirts don’t look as good on me as they once did and my jeans are getting a little tight. Sure, I tried to blame it on the dryer. Damn, this must have shrunk. Luckily I had one of those epiphany’s that one gets from time to time. “Wait a second, I don’t put this shirt in the dryer, Holy Crap I’m getting fat!“.
Just like the realization of being an addict, I came to the realization that I’m gaining weight and that something needs to be done about it before it gets any worse. And by any worse, I mean becoming a lard ass. Hey, I can get away with saying that…it’s my ass.
I have now made a conscious decision to eat properly and I have also started back to the gym. It’s only been 3 days of doing cardio but already I am feeling better about myself. The benefit I get from going to the gym, besides the obvious one of burning calories, is that when a craving for a not so good food arises I think about my work-out for that day and how eating this would nullify my hard work.
What I am finding is that by applying some of the coping skills that I have learned in addiction recovery towards trying to lose weight I am better able to make the right decisions and not give into temptation. I actually take some time and think about what the consequences of me eating something not so healthy would be compared to the benefits. So far, so good.
It seems that the saying “you are only given what you can handle” is really ringing true throughout my addiction recovery. Who does the actual giving is still pretty much hazy to me but maybe that will come in time also.
I’ll break it down for you and show you what I mean. First, I realized that I was a drug addict and somehow I was able to handle that and get myself the help that I needed to get.
Slowly after being in addiction recovery for a little while I was able to then look at some of my behaviors that I had been ignoring and begin modifying my bad behaviors. Something just clicked in my brain and I knew, hey it’s time.
After that came my realization that I had been on antidepressants for a while and maybe I should try leaving antidepressants behind. I just knew that I no longer needed this crutch to lean on.
That brings me back to this latest realization that I need to concentrate on all of those things and now include my diet and exercise. I don’t know, maybe it’s not as mind blowing to anyone else but it truly is to me.
It feels as though my brain is waking back up little by little and soon it will be working as a whole again. In the mean time I am very grateful to be where I am at at this very moment in my life.